In a recent staff meeting,  Bob mentioned the recent trend of European laws banning women from wearing Burqas and Nijabs. This is a trend that began in Belgium back in April when the Lower House approved a bill banning the  use of a Burqa and imposing a fine of €15-25 ($20-33) or imprisonment of one to seven days for those who break the law. Since then, France and Spain have joined the race and politicians from Germany rallied to have the law be extended to the entire European Union (which was since examined and denied).  There are many reasons being quoted by politicians for this movement, but the most common reason quoted in the media boils down to an argument the Burqa undermines gender equality.

This is not a new idea. My own first exposure to the politics Burqas and Nijabs came through an episode of 7th Heaven that aired back in 1999 which emphasized the Burqa as the key symbol of the Taliban’s oppression of women. As I recall, my outraged (reactive) adolescent feminist self went straight into researching, printing pictures, and carrying a petition. I firmly held that no good could come from wearing a Burqa.

So it caught me by surprise when Bob suggested that forcing women to not wear a Burqa would be experienced by some women in the same spirit as forcing her to not wear a shirt. Whoa.

I suddenly felt ashamed of my 13 year old self. Not for protesting the Taliban’s abuse of women, but for assuming that the clothing and the violence were synonymous without considering that there  are cultural differences at play that I didn’t (and don’t) understand.

My initial reaction to Bob’s comment was to retract everything my 13 year old self believed and only take in the new information I had. But that’s not really a responsible reaction either.

What I’ve realized is that I need to come to terms with my own discomfort and reactivity in order to be able to sit with the information available and sift through it with more openness. I don‘t have enough information to form an educated opinion about the laws that propose a ban on Burqas. The truth is, I feel incredibly uncomfortable seeing pictures of women in Burqas. At the same time, I am aware of the Wright Institute voice inside my head that clings to the importance of holding people as whole and complete. There’s a blatant victimization in telling women who choose to wear Burqas that they need to be rescued from their culture. In forcing restrictions like this in the name of gender equality, aren’t we sending the message that they are incapable of good decision making and handing them a condescending “you just don‘t understand yet”? How liberating is that? And, on a more elementary level, I firmly believe that women’s rights cannot be won by eliminating choices and limiting behaviors and that freedom is never gained my imposing a restriction.

I feel scared about how easy it is for me to fall into the trap of thinking that everything is black and white even though situation after situation has proven that it’s not. My instinct is to start debating issues instead of recognizing that there are people with emotions attached to them. I wonder what would happen if we would all confront our emotions and approach the discussion a little more vulnerably– try to see the other side rather than digging our heals in for the sake of being right. Because I think the Burqa ban, and many debates like it, would be completely different discussions, they wouldn’t be as contentious and, the resolution would probably be far more satisfying to everyone.

Sara